Don't speak. Let me in.

(Lavender in Bloom-}
{2003-04-17} {10:21 a.m.}

Sometimes I wish I was a flower. Not just one tiny flower, but one that continues to grow in multiples of multiples. One with little purplish dainty flowers. Graceful; yet so elegant in color and appearance. My exterior masking my true inner self. I could be refined, poised, charming and attractive. Someone would walk pass me and want to just pluck me out of a field of roses. I would be stylish and pleasing to the eye. I would flourish and bloom, thriving in youth and color. Lavenders of pinks and blue, crimson in form tantalizing the minds eye. Sapphire to the soul I would capture someone heart. My character being of a new found meaning. Resting on the sweetness of the fresh found dew of the dawn, I would be able to strengthen myself in the sunlight, instead of wilting and drooping from years of trampling.

I want to dazzle the minds eye instead of pushing the psyche away. I want to be held and caressed and loved. Flowers have a way of bringing the slightest bit of happiness to someone. I want to be a lavender flower with stems and vines that grow with so much appeal like the warmth of the sun. Bright crimson colors of bloom, breathtaking yet soft and delicate. Magnificent in color, spectacular in appearance; dripping with sweetness and beauty. Blushes of bud go red and scarlet in burgundies of bloom open out shouting “Come look at me! Come look at me!” Releasing all of the inner beauty that I have revealing all of my love on the outside in my on look appearance as I smile at the world with no fear or doubts. Giving the impression that you have the permission to gaze and stare.

And as you look on at my youth and beauty I would grow in a vine like loveliness alluring and charming you. I would be bright and vibrant, lively and effervescent, bubbly and full of life. Intense indigos deep and passionate still motionless; yet so moving. My attractiveness enticing the beguiled soul, I become too tempting to resist. I want to be so sweet and strong that I could mend the poorest of any broken heart and heal broken scars. Oh how I wish I was a flower. I wish I was beautiful to look at, soft to the touch but still gentle to the wind. Petals flowing in the breeze as I mark another path in history. Sinuous and curving a trail to a new passageway to shadows of blooms. Light and radiant in luminous color I would be able to capture any one. I would be for the fist time in my life happy and joyfully glowing. Even when the clouds of sunshine have turned to darkness; with down pouring rain. I would open up my petals and capture every drop of water that would fall upon me.

Unlocking all of the sadness inside as I would flourish with nourishment from within, waking with a new freshness. My newness being an originality of my own; leaving my uniqueness a new creativity of your imagination. Can you envision yourself as a flower in bloom? A novelty of some sort? Sparkling and dazzling? Luminous, instead of dull and depressing?

I would rather be adoring and tender. A flower in bloom is what I want to be. But I know that I cannot, so therefore I can only wish for things I want to be. Instead of what I really am.

-Untrendy Flower-

preventry nextentry